Bakers' Dozen

Before I go rambling, I have to say that our cat smells like jelly donuts right now, and it's really fucking with my head.

Yes. You read that right.

Our cat smells like Jelly Fucking Donuts.

So take any of tonight's ramblings with a grain of salt, as I'm sitting here thinking of sweet, sweet Dunkies...


...but I'm staring at this gangly beast and his snipped-tight, surgically circumvented ballsack:


It's fucking with you, too, and you can't even smell the jelly...

Admit it.

Rest assured, I got in there for a good sniff.

My nose is a bit out of practice. I'll admit, if I dug deep, there may be a hint of cinnamon cruller about him that I'm not catching, but I can confirm that our cat is 93% jelly donut smell right now.

I don't know about your God, but mine's got a sense of humor.


Fortunately, I have yet to be hit by lightning.

As many of my disgruntled cousins would readily admit (when they're not praying each night that a Google search for the obscure surname "Preskenis" won't turn up "filth and trash"), it's only a matter of time before I'm smitten.

Or smoted.

Or hit by lightning or something.

Whatever.

Fuck 'em. I'm happier than I've ever been.

It's kind of freaking me out.

I'm relaxed, I'm happy, I don't wake up every morning 15-items into a running list of "Top 9 Reasons to Be Self-Destructive"...

We'll see how long this will last before the next great existential crisis hits.

And when it does, please don't ignore me this time.

Of course, I don't want you to go overboard.

The last thing I want is an office full of Successories.


To be honest, I kind of enjoy a good existential crisis.

After all, there's nothing like that feeling that you're watching your own life unfold from a third row seat in your own brain...


The great thing is, it all works out in the end, panic attacks or no panic attacks...

What else is new?

I think a better question is, "what isn't new?"

For example, there's a lot of talk about the Cat Circus...

And rightfully so.

Outside of that, Niki and I have a ton of fun shit coming up.

Maybe that's why I'm happy...

I'll apologize right now. Happy's kind of boring blog-wise, but I'm not complaining.

Turns out, it doesn't take much to amuse me...